Discuss or debate??

On an early and wet Sunday morning, instead of spending a cosy day snugging below our blankets, me and my husband went all the way to Orchard to catch an early morning show with our friends at The Cathay. (usually when it's raining, he doesn't ride his bike so we had to take a train down)

We didn't get any seats because we didn't start our journey at BL. We stood here the door so that we can get a bird's eye view of the scenery outside. Halfway through the journey, a Chinese man, in his mid 50s probably came up to my husband and asked;' Is your wife a Chinese?' He was surprised and I was surprised too.

He answered:'Yes'.

Man in his 50s replied: 'Yeah, no wonder she didn't look like a Malay. He looked at me and asked:'So you convert to Islam?'

Me:'Yup. Both me and my husband, but he converted earlier, even before we got married.'

Man:'So both of you believed in Islam, God and Muhammad s.a.w?

Me:' Yes.'

Man:'I have 2 questions. Why did Muhammad saw told his followers to marry 4 wives and not to eat pork?'

Me:'He didn't tell us to marry 4 wives.' It is restricted up to 4 wives. And during his time, he didn't marry them out of desire but because they were all widows caused by the war.' (and I didn't had the opportunity to explain the clause;'to treat all 4 equally and justly', he cut me off)

Man:'But one of his wife, the youngest one, was only 9years old' (he was referring to Ai'sha r.a and he didn't give me the opportunity to explain).

Me:'Let me explain. Muhammad s.a.w is our Prophet and Messenger send by God. Whatever that inspires him comes to him by revelation, not his own doing.' (he cut me off ago, obviously not wanting to understand more facts)

Man:'So my conclusion, after this conversation, i can tell that you have faith in God. '

And that was it. He went out of the train.

Throughout this conversation, my husband didn't participate in the conversation. His negative body language, as he later told me, was to hint to the man that he doesn't want him to talk to us much. But I wanted to; not harbouring any suspecting thoughts about him 'attacking' the religion, this could be my chance to do da'wah. I thought that he wanted to find out more initially, but then it turned out to be just our Prophet, the polygamy issue and the 'swine'.

My husband said that I was too fast in replying and I should take more time to answer his questions carefully, for his agenda was not because he was inclined towards knowing more about Islam but to throw accusations at our Prophet s.a.w. I admitted that I wasn't really good at giving him answers to make him think harder, but I was telling him whatever that I know and whatever that comes to my mind. I know this is not a very good method. Of course, if given an opportunity to sit down and discuss more, surely I need to do more research. But it's just a short encounter on the train :)

I know my weakness. May Allah swt forgive my shortcomings. amin.