Thank you all bloggers' (Shan and Fatihah) !! Thank you thank you! You all have been most kind to give the moral support and encouragement. the healing process would be alot easier with having you people around... *Mmmuuacckss*
consolation words had been pouring in since i blogged out my sad love story. i had friends whom i neva met concerned about me. what about Linus*? where have he been?
18 Jan 06. etched in my memory. including all that we have gone through. locked up inside my head.. getting it removed is hard because of the amount of time spent and the accumulation of memories we had together. on 18 Jan, this very day, i saw a vehicle with his initials on it and i saw many many Ford Ms around. the numbers neva went down even though i have stopped looking at cars travelling on the road.
Since 18 Jan 06, Linus* had repeatedly told me that all this that happened wasnt simply what he could foresee or plan in advance. with God's will, we need to accept that anything that He wills to happen, nothing can change it. and this fact of us not coming together as a couple testifies that God has the power to will what He wants and what He doesnt want.
I'm a muslim. i truly believe that God has powers none could mimic or possess. i truly believe that if He wills it, no one could stop Him.
Now I wonder has he heard my prayers? i prayed every day hoping that Linus* could be with me through God's blessings. but this isn't happening and i still haven't got over it. Do i really have to resign to what He has already planned? if He had better plans for me, did He also plan that i had to take on such burden of hearing those sad parting words from Linus*?
Since 18 Jan 06, i had been going round and round circles, thinking whether am i wrong not to accept what God has willed? sometimes i really dont feel like accepting. is this sinful?
i hear a voice shouting within: "I dun wanna accept God's will. i dun wanna accept that He has taken him away from me."
i simply cant get myself out from this black pit hole.
2 comments:
no worries Blue... we all just want to see u back to normal. *HUGZ*
God probably just wants to make u stronger so he made u listen to those painful words coming from Linus. He has a plan for all of us. Fear not. Just TRY to accept it that some things happen for a reason. Altho He may put us thru pain and suffering, He knows we will recover and thats why He wants us to learn from it.
If u you feel like you are in a hole, try to get out. stop the rot and live life a day at a time. say a prayer. God will get you thru it. God bless you Blue Angel!
ehMay God bless you too Shan :)
You've been such a great consolation!
Post a Comment